Surgery Day: Multiple Choices

Since Jenn will be on a business trip, I told Will that he would need to update the blog on surgery day and then I proceeded to boss him about what to say to which he responded, “Why don’t YOU just write it.”  So I thought I would make it easy and set things up for him.  Check back later for his selection among the following multiple choice answers.

Tuesday – day before
Lisa:

1. Packs her bag for the hospital, oops takes out the swim suit – this isn’t a vacation – adds reading glasses as the last few months have taken a toll on her eyes.
2. Disappears mid day and we are still looking for her.
3. Interviews prospective anesthesiologists and gives them each a personal health questionnaire.
4. Spends entire day at Costco stocking up.
5. Gets a pedicure.

Surgery Day -am
Lisa:

1. Rushes out the door and grabs her ID and oops Costco card instead of insurance card – Freudian slip – volume discounts?
2. Jumps off the gurney and is last seen chasing the shuttle bus, gown flapping.
3. Passes brain surgeon on the way into surgery, high fives him and says, “See you in 6 weeks, Doc.”
4. Having second thoughts, she uses a sharpie to write, “other breast” on both sides.

Surgery Day – pm
Lisa:

1. Doesn’t notice that Will sneaks over to Costco during surgery for free samples.
2. Has a blood transfusion and feels perky on the happy donor blood.
3. Has a heart attack – defibrillators work like shock therapy and her depression is cured.
4. Emerges from surgery and is happy to find she is five pounds lighter, well, three, maybe three pounds. 

Day after surgery
Lisa:

1. Is enjoying heated hospital blankets, being waited upon, and watching daytime television for the first time in her life.  Requests Bon Bons and peeled grapes from room service.
2. Is suffering from the effects of too many surgeries/too much anesthesia and has no short term memory – has no idea where she is or what happened – blissfully.
3. Commandeers a vacant wheelchair and goes for a joy ride.
4. Has a great view of Costco and charts peak periods, wonders what’s on sample.
5. Tires of daytime television and decides to use the time wisely by trying to learn Spanish from channel 39.  (Hey, this is not a bad idea!)
6. Caught stashing warm hospital blankets and fuzzy blue hospital socks in her take home bag. At first disappointed, then realizes she'll have many more opportunities.